7 Habits for Christian Couples to Cultivate a Happy Marriage Today

1. Daily Joint Prayer

Prayer serves as a potent means of connecting with God and with one’s spouse. When a couple prays together, they invite God more deeply into their relationship by aligning their hearts and minds with His will. As Jesus stated in Matthew 18:20, “For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” To establish this as a routine, set aside a specific time each day or night for couple’s prayer. It could be as straightforward as a morning prayer for the day’s events or an evening prayer of gratitude. Pray for each other’s needs, aspirations, and spiritual development. Over time, this practice will foster a sense of unity among the couple and God. Regardless of the challenges faced, daily joint prayer provides fresh strength to rely on God in every life situation. When praying, there’s no need to adhere to a particular format. Feel free to pray in the manner that suits the couple best at the moment. Let the prayer communication with God be natural and unforced. View it as an opportunity rather than an obligation. Create a secure environment where both can be vulnerable before each other and God. The more enjoyable the prayer experience is, the greater the motivation to continue daily.

2. Mutual Kindness and Forgiveness

In every relationship, conflicts are inevitable, and married couples will inevitably have disagreements and arguments. Nevertheless, happy Christian couples treat each other with kindness and are prompt in forgiving each other’s mistakes. Ephesians 4:32 exhorts, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Harboring grudges only poisons the relationship with resentment and bitterness. Instead, forgiveness paves the way for healing and reconciliation. After a conflict, choose to forgive promptly. Don’t let anger linger. When you sin, ask God and your spouse for forgiveness, and be ready to forgive your spouse when they cause you harm.
Forgiveness does not imply ignoring the issues that led to the conflict in the marriage. Instead, it liberates you to address those issues in a loving way. Remember, forgiveness is a choice that enables you both to love each other as God loves you. Forgiving one another can enhance the love and trust within the relationship. It also sets a good example for family and friends, demonstrating the power of God’s love in action. Additionally, it’s crucial to develop empathy within the marriage. When you disagree, try to understand your spouse’s perspective. Put yourself in their shoes and consider their feelings and motives. Listen attentively to what your spouse is saying without interrupting or planning your response while they are still speaking. Create a safe space for open and honest communication by assuring each other of kindness and forgiveness.

3. Joint Bible Reading and Study

Regularly allocate time in your schedule to seek God through joint Bible reading and study. Psalm 119:105 proclaims, “Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.” The more a couple immerses themselves in the Bible, the more they can grow in holiness and acquire the wisdom to make sound decisions. Therefore, determine the most suitable ways to incorporate Bible reading and study into your busy lives. Any plan that works well for the couple on a regular basis can be beneficial. It can be helpful to select specific topics relevant to your current relationship (such as patience or finding more joy) and discuss related Bible verses or passages. Other approaches, like using a daily devotional with assigned Bible readings, can also be effective. Studying the Bible together also creates opportunities for the couple to discuss applying their faith to their lives. This can aid in individual and marital growth as a team seeking God.
As you explore the Bible daily, you’ll gain a better understanding of God’s plan for your lives. Sharing this understanding can strengthen your connection with God and each other. Throughout the different stages of your marriage, maintaining the habit of joint Bible reading and study will help you consistently apply God’s wisdom to your relationship and build a fulfilling marriage.

4. Serving Others as a Couple

Happy Christian couples find delight in serving others together. Galatians 5:13 encourages, “Serve one another humbly in love.” Don’t be concerned about feeling drained by serving. The more a couple gives to others, the more God’s love flows through their lives, revitalizing and refreshing them. Helping others together is a vital way to put love into action. So, look for service opportunities that align with your interests and talents – such as volunteering at church, supporting a cause you’re both passionate about, or assisting a neighbor like a single parent or an elderly person. Serving others strengthens the relationship. As you work together to bless others, you’ll discover a deeper sense of fulfillment and connection. It also allows you to see each other’s strengths and compassion in action, leading to mutual respect and admiration in the marriage. By focusing your energies outward through serving others, God will bless you with greater fulfillment within yourselves and in your relationship.

5. Regularly Expressing Gratitude

Expressing gratitude is a powerful habit that can transform your perspective, enabling you and your spouse to see each other as God sees you, which brings joy. The Bible, in 1 Thessalonians 5:18, encourages, “… give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” Happy Christian couples frequently express appreciation for each other. Each day, take the time to let your spouse know something you’re thankful for about who they are as a person. Also, regularly inform your spouse how much you value what they do. Whenever your spouse does something particularly kind or helpful, point it out and thank them. Making gratitude a habit in your marriage will regularly remind you of God’s blessings in your relationship and train your mind to adopt a positive outlook. This will help you and your spouse experience joy in any situation.
Over time, this habit of expressing gratitude can significantly enhance the emotional bond between you and your spouse. Besides expressing gratitude for your spouse and their actions, remember to also frequently thank God for the gift of your marriage. Regularly pray together and give thanks for all the guidance and grace God continuously bestows on your relationship. Discuss the challenges you face with God and ask for the wisdom and strength needed to overcome them. Choosing to give thanks regularly can contribute to a happy marriage in any circumstance.

6. Jointly Pursuing God’s Wonders

Happy Christian couples are attentive to the wonders of God’s work every day and allow themselves to be inspired with awe. Psalm 65:8 states, “The whole is filled with awe at your wonders; where morning dawns, where evening fades, you call forth songs of joy.” You and your spouse can uncover countless wonders when you deliberately seek glimpses of God’s work in your lives. Therefore, make it a top priority to pursue these wonders, regardless of how busy your day is. One especially effective way to do this is to go outdoors and explore nature together. Nature reveals the magnificence of God. Wherever you go in creation, you’ll encounter something that reflects the Creator’s wonderful attributes.
Pursuing God’s wonders together will help you and your spouse create joyful memories. It can also help you maintain a healthy perspective on your relationship by reminding you that your marriage is part of a much greater story designed by God. Another benefit of jointly pursuing God’s wonders is that it inspires you both to be humble and thankful. As you and your spouse witness God’s marvelous works around you, you’ll naturally realize how small you are compared to God’s greatness. This humbling experience encourages you to give thanks for the blessings you’ve received, including your spouse and the opportunity to experience God’s love together. Sharing these moments of awe and gratitude deepens your connection with God and each other, thereby contributing to a happy marriage.

7. Celebrating Milestones and Dreams

You and your spouse can also enjoy a happy marriage by commemorating your journey so far and looking forward to what God will do in the future. Proverbs 16:3 advises, “Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.” Reflecting on the milestones you’ve achieved together and planning future goals strengthens your partnership and keeps you focused on God’s purpose for your lives. So, regularly celebrate all that God has done, is doing, and will do in your lives. Thank God for His faithfulness and all the answered prayers. Dream together about your future, setting goals that honor God and working towards them while relying on God for help. Keep in mind that your marriage is a journey under God’s direction. Therefore, strive to seek God’s guidance for your decisions. Communicate openly and honestly with God and each other. Regularly schedule quality time for each other, free from distractions, to share your thoughts and feelings with your spouse and your Heavenly Father.

In conclusion, building a joyful and fulfilling marriage requires intentional effort, but the rewards are well worth it. As Ecclesiastes 4:12 reminds us, “A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” If you place God at the center of your marriage, you and your spouse will be a happy couple!

What are your thoughts on conflict in marriage? There’s a common misconception that healthy marriages are conflict-free. However, this couldn’t be further from the truth. Listen as we debunk this myth and explain why couples in healthy marriages do experience conflict. If this episode benefits your marriage, be sure to subscribe to Team Us on Apple or Spotify to never miss an episode.